A man who’s already a father and a man who’s about to become one are taking a walk through the woods. The second man says to the first, “It’s already a lot harder than I expected it to be.”
“Don’t worry, dude, after the baby’s born, it gets way easier.”
“No, are you stupid? It just keeps getting harder.”
After our engagement, friends who’d already taken the plunge advised us to enjoy the feeling without thinking too hard about what was to come. They said it with a glance equally knowing and jealous. They’d come from the future to warn us, but what about?
They occupy a different phase of life, one that’s fuller in some senses and heavier in others. They’ve made it through a few more cycles of “If I can just get through this week, things will slow down,” and I think they were trying to tell us that things don’t settle down from here, they only get layered on.
There’s more, not necessarily bad or good, just more, and it starts to go a little faster, too. So, yeah, they meant enjoying the anticipation of what was to come without being encumbered by the actual planning of a wedding (and then the actual planning of a family and then the actual planning of a move to a space that will fit said family), but also pausing to appreciate the magnitude of what was happening right now.
Because there will always be more, probably starting tomorrow, but for now it’s today, and that’s plenty.