Art's hard, and I'm soft
Creation is a paradox.
On the one hand, I love working on this newsletter, and having a weekly deadline keeps me accountable. It’s not always easy, but I always feel a lift when I’ve sent out another edition.
On the other hand, there’s anxiety around sharing myself and my ideas even if it’s only with 170 of you. Art’s hard, I’m soft, and reports of the ego’s death have been greatly exaggerated.
You might think someone who started a writing project on a platform predicated on direct distribution would be seeking attention, and that’s true to an extent, but it’s not the whole story. We all want to share work we’re proud of, and I’m proud of the writing I do here, but that doesn’t make it any less nerve-wracking to hit send.
Even if you’re not writing for public consumption yourself, I’d bet you find yourself in a similar position nearly every day. It might be an email or a presentation or a conversation with a friend. You hit unsend, you rewrite, you self-edit. You feel better when it’s been written or said or sent, but then begins the period where you start to wonder what will be sent back. While I ultimately do this for myself, I know I wouldn’t be able to do it as regularly if it weren’t for the folks who click the heart button and send encouragement.
Putting yourself or your art out there is hard. You might be misunderstood, chided, or worst of all, ignored. But we do it anyways. Because not sharing would be worse than the harshest critique, would be failing before we’ve even begun.